Yesterday night was our annual celebration of Festivus between my closest and dearest friends. Yes, I'm talking about Festivus as inspired by Frank Costanza on Seinfield. For Frank, it began as a struggle with a man over a doll they were both trying to purchase for their children; the doll in the end was destroyed and Frank realized that there must be a better way than all of this commercialization during the holidays. Thus was born, Festivus. The history of Festivus is actually true and was developed from one of Seinfield's writers whose father found it through researching ancient European holidays.
Our history with Festivus really began when we all realized we were dirt poor and couldn't afford gifts for each other. So we all made some excellent non traditional grub, slapped together a Festivus pole and drank to severe inebriation. Of course, along the lines of the traditional Festivus activities, we did have our "Airing of Grievances" - which involved mostly people we hate at work and family. Some choice grievances:"To (boyfriend) who has taken seven years off my life!"
"To all the people who work for me - well except the fifteen year old, he's cool"
"To (friend at the table) who broke my (friend's boyfriend as mentioned above)"
"To (me!) who ruined my mother's meatball recipe!" - (well that was obviously from the man, apparently my meatballs should not have been fried first therefore making them too dry. Screw you, the man!)
"To my in-laws who drive me crazy" - wife
"To my in-laws who drive me crazy" - husband
We did however veer from traditions by playing Pictionary instead of the "Feats of Strength" which is certainly much easier on our backs but harder on our wrists! After all the high stress cooking I did for my family this year, ungrateful looks during gift exchanges, and the coolness of my family once feeding is over, well let's just say, I look forward to Festivus next year.
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