C is for Crass...

I am biting off of Lauren from SketchLABC and using the alphabet to inspire the fucking creativity out of my brain and drawing hand... While Lauren creates images that are made of sugar and spice and everything nice, I, on the other hand, have a perverted and foul brain and create things that are made of frogs and snails and puppy dog tails. (Sometimes it even bothers me that I work with children) The only safe sketch I have so far is "C". I created this picture in honor of my sister's mother-in-law who absolutely repulses me - particularly during mealtimes. Somehow, this woman manages to fling food everywhere -left, right, up and down- while chewing. Not only does bits of masticated food surround her like a Jackson Pollock piece (though certainly not as aesthetic), it is plastered up and down her face, arms and hands - the very same hands she uses to fist a bowl full of shrimp cocktail sauce later. Before every huge family event, the man and I hatch complicated plans to secure our meal from the buffet table before she gets to it and thwart anyone's plan to have us sit anywhere near her. Oh yes, this one definitely goes out to her.